Death in the family

A good friend of mine has a father who is dying of cancer. More exactly he's bleeding to death.
An ulcer in his upper intestinal track is making him bleed out. Without the transfusions he'd just slip away.
I called and texted him inviting him out for a beer, something, anything to help take his mind off what's going on and what he's dealing with. If at least for an hour or so. Give his emotions time to recharge.

My friend is handling it very well. The closest experience I've had that helps me relate is the death of my Uncle. He passed away around the same time my father in law did.
My Wife took the girls to New Orleans to be with her father and I went to Orlando to attend my Uncles funeral.
So, I kind of have an idea of what he's going through. I'm lucky I guess. I still have my Dad around. I should call him tomorrow and say hi.

Now my friend is going there. Where childhood emotions, memories, expectations and guilt all seem to take over. I remember whens, and he could have still done this, and God why didn't I do that's. Yeah, I'll call my Dad and say hello.

A new friend of mine says that the hardest part isn't now. Not what you're doing now, dealing with death, the funeral, cleaning up. That's all numbed by shock.
He says that the hardest part will come a year from now when you're sitting at home and say, "ah, lets go visit Dad"........and then remember that you can't.

He's so right.